Deacon Paul Pole-Baker

Paul (Paul Cecil Pole Baker) was born in Herne Bay, Kent on 6th November 1931, the first child of Cecil and Eileen Baker. He was educated at the local convent school and at Chatham House School, Ramsgate. At the age of 17 when he was called up for National Service, he decided to join the Royal Air Force, and signed up for 5 years, eventually becoming a Sergeant. He had hoped to be sent abroad, to Cyprus, but instead he was sent to the Royal Aircraft Establishment (RAE) in Farnborough. Since there was another Paul Baker, he was told to use Pole-Baker instead. He was offered the chance to become an Officer but declined and left the RAF to stay at the RAE.

Paul decided to take advantage of the RAE’s policy of encouraging further education and chose to study for Higher National in Applied Physics at Guildford Technical College. It was here that he met me, as I was studying the same subject; he helped me with the electronics, and I helped him with his maths.

We soon began going out together; he asked me to marry him three weeks later, and we were married the following year, on 16th August 1958 in Our Lady Help of Christians in North Camp, by Fr. William Marrs SDB.

Paul continued his studies and became a Graduate of the Institute of Physics and a Chartered Engineer, a long-time Member of the Institute of Engineering and Technology. Later he began working in another branch of the Civil Service, the Patents Directorate, which involved some legal training as he was dealing with government contacts. He finished his career as a Senior Patents Officer.

Paul was a man of deep faith; we had long discussions about his Catholic Christian beliefs, which led me to become a Catholic before our marriage and so we were able have a Nuptial Mass. Our first child, Bernadette was born a year later, followed in quick succession by Teresa, Michael Judy, and Louise.

At first, we lived in a flat in a house belonging to an elderly lady in Gravel Road, not far from the church. Paul always enjoyed gardening and immediately began to tend the lady’s garden. He used to take some of the fruit and vegetables to the Salesian College.

Paul was always involved in church activities; he joined the local Knights of St. Columba organisation (KSC), and later, after his ordination, became their Chaplain. He also started a Youth Club, with a football team, in the Parish Hall.

We bought our first house, in Firs Close, in 1960, and Paul immediately began to cultivate our garden and so we were rarely short of vegetables.

As our family grew, we decided it was time to find a larger property, and we moved to a house called ‘Nyetimber’ on the Farnborough Road near to the Technical College. This was an older house that needed updating; the renovations kept Paul busy for many years. It had a large garden where the children enjoyed playing and where Paul continued to garden. Paul continued his involvement with the church and hosted a St. Vincent de Paul (SVP) Conference which met weekly. When Ecumenical House Groups were started in our area, we hosted groups there too.

We acquired a VW camper van and had many enjoyable holidays with our family around the country and in France; we slept in the van and the children in our large tent. In retirement, we visited friends and family in Germany, Portugal and Ireland, and went on a memorable pilgrimage to the Holy Land.

Paul always loved music; we, together with our eldest daughter Bernadette, sang with the Our Lady Help of Christians church choir. When a men’s choir was formed at St. Michael’s Abbey, Paul joined it, and later Mike joined too.

In the summer, the Abbey Choir used to sing Evensong at a different Cathedral each year, including Canterbury and Norwich. Paul was often left in charge of the boys while the other men went to the local pub and became quite famous for telling the boys ghost stories. We also sang with the local Rushmoor Choir for many years. The Abbey always hosted coffee after Mass and Paul liked to encourage people in the congregation to come along to it to get to know one another.

In 1986, the Diocese started to introduce Eucharistic Ministers; Paul and I, and several others from our parish, went on a training course, which gave us much more insight into the Eucharist. We were commissioned in 1986, which felt a great honour.

Dom Placid (Fr. David) Higham, the Prior, was asked if the monks would look after the parish of Our Lady of Lourdes, as OLSD was then called. Fr. David asked Paul if he had considered becoming a deacon; Paul knew little about the diaconate but started to think about it, then a couple of weeks later, Fr. Mario Sanderson asked him the same thing. Occasionally I used to go to a Charismatic Meeting in Alton, and Paul would sometimes accompany me. When Paul heard that Fr. Leon Targett, a priest from our diocese, was giving a talk, he came with me as he had met him before and had great respect for him. He intended to ask Fr Leon’s advice about becoming a deacon. Fr. Leon always prayed with people so intensely that he was quite exhausted afterwards, and, on that occasion, he almost collapsed onto Paul; Paul said he felt energy draining out of him to Fr. Leon, and then, before Paul had spoken to him, Fr. Leon said ‘You wanted to speak to me, and the word that came to my mind, was Deacon! Paul later said to me, “After the third time I have got the message, the Lord is calling.”

He applied to the diocese and was accepted for training, which took three years. He had to attend monthly lectures at St. John’s Seminary, Wonersh. Wives of prospective deacons were encouraged to come with their husbands, and I always accompanied Paul, also to some residential weekends. Paul’s personal tutor, Fr. Bernard Fisher, was very supportive; Paul was very upset when Fr. Bernard died shortly before he was ordained. Paul’s Ordination was performed by Bishop Crispian Hollis on 5th July 1990 in our church, at that time Our Lady of Lourdes. He conducted his first baptism soon after. Paul retired from the Civil Service the following year.

Fr. Magnus did not like performing baptisms, they were all delegated to Paul, who thought that he had performed more than a hundred, including those of several of our grandchildren. He was also called upon to do weddings, usually in Cove, but also occasionally at the Abbey, and prepared the couples for their weddings. He introduced four-week Baptism Courses in Cove, each time involving a different couple from the parish. This eventually led to some of the couples starting the Tiddlers and Toddlers Group. He assisted at funerals and often conducted those that took place at the Aldershot Crematorium; he also gave regular homilies.

Paul was a man without vanity, and the most difficult part of being a deacon for him was being in the limelight. He did not like having his photograph taken and tended not to smile or to make faces.

In 1991, following changes at the Abbey, Fr. David moved elsewhere, Fr. Magnus was made Prior Administrator and Fr. Michael Fava was made Priest-in-Charge of Cove.

We had both become involved in the RCIA process before Paul’s ordination and later led it for many years. Paul started a bookshop at the church both in the church and at the Abbey, in 1984, selling religious books and Catholic Truth Society publications. The bookshop was popular and gained funds for the church.

After Fr. Tony Sultana SDB became Parish Priest, Paul had less work to do in the parish, and so we decided to return to St John’s Seminary to study for a degree in Theology and graduated together from Surrey University in 2001.

Paul had been diagnosed with Type 2 Diabetes, which began to take a toll on his health and in 2010 he decided it was time to retire from the active diaconate. His declining health impacted his mobility and an infection in his heel resulted in surgery and continual visits to the podiatrist. After suffering a stroke in 2022 and subsequent critical infections it became no longer possible for him to remain at home, and he moved into Cedar Lodge Nursing Home, where he had excellent care, although he was never quite reconciled to not living at home.

At the end of May this year he suffered another critical infection, and we were informed that he was approaching the end of life. Fr. Anthony anointed him in hospital, and shortly afterwards he returned to Cedar Lodge, where he died peacefully in the early hours of 21 August; my daughter Teresa and I were with him. The previous Saturday, 16 August, had been our 67th Wedding Anniversary.  His Requem Mass took place at Our Lady of Lourdes and St Dominic Savio on Thursday 25th September 2025 celebrated by Bishop Philip Egan, Bishop of Portsmouth.  

Paul was a wonderful husband and father, loving and supportive, and is sorely missed by all our family, leaving five children, nine grandchildren, and four great-grandchildren.